A research paper says people are more likely to believe you if you use long words when asking for forgiveness. I prefer to keep it simple
A bloke in a service station once said something really horrible to me. But he swiftly followed it up with one of the most sincere apologies I’ve ever been on the end of. This was at Hopwood Park services on the M42, years ago. I’d just pulled up at the pump. Clocking me, he knocked on the passenger window, and when I opened it he stuck his head in and said something vile. It could have been classed as banter, I suppose, but it was still vile. My two young children were in the back, all wide-eyed in bafflement. Upset more than angry, I got out, filled up and went to pay, only to find him waiting by the car when I returned. He put his hand on my shoulder and said, “I’m sorry mate. I didn’t know you had your kids in the car. I apologise for that.” There was something about the last four words which made the difference, somehow adding just the right amount of emphasis.
I wasn’t particularly pleased to have such a memory stirred this week when I read about a research paper, published by the British Psychological Society, on how the length of the words you use when you make an apology are important in conveying your sincerity. Apologies always fascinate me because, as far as I can see, without contrition on one side and forgiveness on the other, we’re all doomed.
