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NEED TO KNOW
- A woman explained on Reddit that she loves her boyfriend but worries about his parents’ constant fighting and harsh insults
- She fears his mother may target her, too, after hearing stories of rude comments made toward others
- When her boyfriend told her to just “bear with it,” she wondered if ending things was the right choice
A woman turned to the Reddit community for advice after finding herself torn between a relationship she cared about and the possibility of a deeply uncomfortable future with her partner’s family.
The 25-year-old shared that she had been dating a 26-year-old man for almost a year and felt they were a strong match, yet she struggled with what his home life might mean for their future.
She explained in her post that they originally met through mutual friends online, even though they lived far apart and were separated by “an 8-hour flight.”
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As they got to know each other better, he revealed that they had actually been classmates years ago and that he had liked her since high school. “He told me he has known me since 8th grade,” she shared, saying he admitted he had been too shy to talk to her back then.
Despite the physical distance, their connection grew quickly, and she described him as overwhelmingly kind. She called him “a huge green flag” and said he was so gentle that even small disagreements left him looking “like a sad cat.”
She appreciated his calm and soft nature, saying that their two disagreements made her feel bad because he seemed unable to handle conflict at all.
But she confessed that her concerns had nothing to do with him. Instead, she said the major issue was his family. “His parents are an absolute nightmare,” she wrote, explaining that she hadn’t met them in person, yet had already heard their constant fighting in the background during calls.
She described them as loud, aggressive and unwilling to address their conflicts in any healthy way.
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She also said his mother’s behavior toward guests had become a serious fear for her. According to her boyfriend, his mother had “no filter and says whatever she wants,” even if her comments were rude or hurtful.
“It’s gotten to the point where his friends don’t want to go to their house because they’re afraid of being insulted,” she shared, saying she had heard multiple stories of the mother openly mocking people.
One friend came over to show off a new haircut, only to be told the haircut made him look “even uglier.” Another friend stopped by the house and was bluntly informed that he had become “really fat.”
As someone who identified herself as “chubby and short,” the poster admitted she worried she would become the next target.
“I’m scared of being talked down to like that,” she wrote, noting she had experienced similar treatment from others in the past and did not want to go through it again.
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What worried her even more was her boyfriend’s response. When she expressed her concerns, he simply told her to ignore it. “He told me that if his mum ever says anything bad, I should just bear with it and ignore it,” she wrote, making it clear that she did not feel comfortable with that expectation.
She added that the idea of marrying into a family like that left her uneasy. “I really don’t want that kind of in-laws,” she admitted.
Reddit commenters didn’t hold back. One wrote, “NTA. This guy is not a green flag he is a massive red flag,” urging her to cut contact entirely. Another commenter agreed she wasn’t in the wrong and added, “You should definitely dump him… this is just the beginning.”
Now, she’s left wondering whether she was in the wrong for considering ending the relationship.



